Struggle

Well i had been thinking a lot.... literally. It is very hard to digest when we compare ourselves with a person of greater caliber. From my childhood i had been the topper in my class. Never felt such thing. I used to think why these people won't study or won't excel in some things like me. In fact, i used to exaggerate my level in my mind that i am the ultimate and can do whatever i want to be. Of course its good to be that way that we should be confident that we can do anything. But being overconfident has its disadvantages. I was almost alone in my school as i kept myself with studying because my family is almost less than middle class i can say. To be with friends it needs somethings to be done as it is childhood, i guess playing could help. But family, the way they create our environment, i guess it will be hard to change. They keep saying you should become a great person like IAS officer, job holder in a big company, so that all would have a bright future. I am not saying they are bad. Its just that there are a lot of things we miss in life. I rarely played in my life. As i was more leaned towards study, my friends weren't much interested i guess, to give me a good role in playing. I also think i looked down on them. See, we were kids. What do we know about life..?

For a person, whatever kind he/she is, is being moulded by the environment they grew in. When we compare, we don't think about that. I felt very very bad when my relatives compared me with my cousins saying that i am a great person, studying in city, got job etc. I wanted to ask these questions to them on their face itself. Why do you think they turned like that? Did they wanted this kind of life?

I agree that i was stupid earlier because of the pride that filled in the mind. Kept under-estimating people and their character. I guess, life is a good but harsh teacher making us learn things after putting us in that position like "giving knowledge/wisdom after putting us exam". And i also want to say, as somebody said, that "You learn more from Failure than Success".

People never want to turn their lives to bad shape. Its habits, difficulties they can't come over (sometimes). All they need is others would understand the problems he might be facing. Only the person who is facing the problem, knows how bad it is effecting him. Others might think that is a joke.